Jesus Christ Simulator Lets You Become the Original Superhero

jesus is wearing a white shirt with a red cross on it and a red cape

jesus is wearing a white shirt with a red cross on it and a red cape

Some would call Jesus H. Christ the first modern superhero. Before Action Comics graced us with The Man of Steel and the MCU brought Iron Man to the big screen, good ol’ Jesus was walking on water and reviving himself with a healing factor to rival Wolverine.

To honor the superhero origins of The Son of God, a new Jesus Christ Simulator game is coming to Steam that truly replicates the iconic Christian superhero’s skill set, performing miracles and, of course, leaping tall buildings in a single bound.

Developed by Crowbar Games, a new trailer for Jesus Christ Simulator gives would-be fans a look at the intricate gameplay systems of the new superhero adventure. Jesus can float in the air like a Dragon Ball character as he hunts down hordes of demons across a modern New York.

The Son of God can even use his myriad powers such as Blood of Christ, powerful Godrocks, God Lasers, the power of storms and The Rapture, as well as good-old-fashioned-fisticuffs to fight the demon scourge. Just as God intended.

Between battling demons, Jesus Christ Simulator lets you perform the miracles the original J.C is known for. You can baptize someone in the streets, cure their addictions, instil them with perfect health or, the biggest miracles of all, pay off their student loans.

Alongside performing these miracles, Jesus Christ Simulator lets players use their godly powers to fly across the modern metropolis with their arms stretched wide. If you see a plane, you can chase it, just like the real Jesus would!

Jesus Christ Simulator has already launched on PC in an early access state - hopefully, a very early access state. It looks pretty damn rough around the edges, like a poorly cut crucifix, and there’s little hope for it being sanded down. However, it may be one of the best Jesus Christ games ever released, just after Jesus Christ RPG and the free prologue for the in-development I Am Jesus Christ.

At the end of the day, it is one massive joke, and for just £1.69/$1.59, it’s a decently funny one.

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